VOYAGER (product evaluation)

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Subject: VOYAGER, prototype #149.


Evaluation of human body started at 0800 hours. Finish: +24 min, 36 sec.


 


Legs.


Main function: transportation. Evaluation: vital.


LEGS PRESERVED.


 


Arms.


Main functions: hold a baby, open doors, operate remote, hug a friend, start a fire, hand gestures, wave goodbye, handshakes, making food, punching someone, clapping, acrobatics, petting a cat, bagging groceries, typing, intimate stimulation, sign language.


Evaluation: 15% useful, 85% obsolete. ARMS REMOVED.


 


Breasts.


Main functions: foreplay, breast-feeding, pleasure centres, subliminal messaging.


Evaluation: 64% useful, 46% useless. EVOLUTIONARY FUNCTIONS TERMINATED.


 


Head.


Main functions: protects brain from injury, receives sensory information, micro-expressions to help communication, facial features to help recognition, hair accommodation.


Evaluation: 4% functional, malfunctions at 6-sec intervals. BRAIN REMOVED.


VISUAL AND AUDITORY CENTRES PRESERVED. Relocated on neck, shoulders, and chest.


 


Torso…


 


VOYAGER #149 SUCCESSFULLY ACTIVATED. Sending to lab for mass reproduction. 


 


 


P.S. My vision for this is a video with running images of the functions presented while the process is ongoing. :)

Created: Aug 12, 2012

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lynmidnight Document Media