Feels like home

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It was as if he built some kind of wall all around my body. He said those words you often hear in the movies. Damn... I even remembered that scene in Garden State, and I saw in my head Natalie Portman smiling with loving eyes. Why did she have that look on her face?
I mean... Really.


He said he felt home around me. He said it like... Like if it was the confession of the year.


I just felt like he had taken a shovel and had started digging in my skin, trying to replace my beauty marks, my scars. The first brick appeared right on my feet. Heavy bricks, let me tell you... It was like having an uncomfortable weight over my shoes, and I just couldn't move... Just like buying pretty shoes that will never fit.


The second brick appeared somewhere down my throat... I couldn't speak, or sing, or laugh or even pretend that what he had just told me was rising an elaborate chimney up my spine, to warm his "home" and ignite my life.


Then bricks banging in my head. Made me dizzy, made me see stars turning around, fuzzing in my ears.


Bricks in my stomach... Who said it fekt like butterflies? Poor guy...


Bricks in my hands, holding his. I just felt as though I wouldn't be able to close them around anybody else's ever again.


And his words were the glue putting everything else together.. Stupid words, stupid saliva.


I'm a building here. I feel like home. I feel like that place you never go to but have a fake memory of what it felt like to be there...


But then... He added the windows. I just had to raise my head, and see his face. And watching him feeling home around me, made the bricks and the glue and the chimney and the painting on the walls and the welcoming rug in front of the front door, and the old furniture with cat hairs spilling all over the place, worth it.

Created: Aug 03, 2012

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