"If we are victorious in one more battle with The Romans, we shall...

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[title cont: ... be utterly ruined." ]

She's pregnant.
Oh, now it all makes sense.
Wait, what?
She's pregnant?


I'm so confused by how I feel, it's hard to explain.
I'm not heartbroken.
Maybe it's grief.
The realization that she's actually, truly and forever gone.
"Moved on." 

I should have known that actually meant, "Having this dude's child."
Some guy! Some guy I've never even met!
Some random shithead sonofabitch sidled up and impregnated the only woman who ever said she wanted to be with me forever
she'd wait years
as long as it took


A bun in the oven. Jesus.
Like some damnable Fucking Jesus Christ Hot Pocket stewing away in the womb of that psycho...
Microwave on High. 9 months.
Jesus.

It's not even funny! There's nothing funny about it!
In Forever, she finally knew herself, held herself with dignity, patience and caring
Confident. Unshakable. Radiating love at me.
She had found herself in the world.
I was so proud and happy for her.


I am so proud and happy for her.
She won.
I won.
And God...how I've lost...

Created: Jun 21, 2012

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