requiem.

By katekaos

When I went home last week
they told me
that the neighbor boy,
a friend of my brother's
who would just wander into
our house without knocking,
and was always polite,
in his small,
brown haired, brown eyed way,

died.

A bone marrow transplant
gone wrong, my mother, said.
He was fifteen like my brother.

"I would have gone
to the funeral
but if John cried, then I
would too, and I didn't
want that,"
my sister
told me, solemn.

"I cried
like a ten year old girl,"
my brother said.

And so I went today
to the racks of cards arranged
in perfect rows
like stadium seating at the movies
in a shop in the mall
to find a preprinted sentiment
to express my sympathy
for a dollar-ninety-nine.

I lingered there
ran my hand over manufactured wishes
and found one that was
not too religious
but not too trivial either.
The perfect
way that I should feel.

"We feel lucky to have heard
the music,"
it read.
And I wondered
if his family felt lucky.

I didn't think so.

My friend Ali,
she died when I went away
to college;
I hadn't seen her
since graduation.
My mother never told me,
just handed me the yellowed clipped
obituary from the newspaper.

"Died of injuries from
a motorcycle accident,"
the paper read.

She wasn't the most perfect
person, admittedly,
But I never get to say goodbye
to anyone who dies.

They always tell me
after the funeral.

I wanted to go
find her grave and tell her
how much I've grown since
she's been gone,
sitting on the plush
grass beside her headstone.

I just wanted to say goodbye.

Document
requiem.

Created: May 06, 2010

Tags:

Document Media

Related Records:

a portrait of the author as performer.
a portrait of the author as performer. By katekaos
geek love.
geek love. By katekaos
morning.
morning. By katekaos
in the basement.
in the basement. By katekaos
i like writing the word comma instead of actual punctuation.
i like writing the word comma instead of actual punctuation. By katekaos
for bigfoot, where ever i may find him.
for bigfoot, where ever i may find him. By katekaos
could someone please explain to me why we are all fixated on the so...
could someone please explain to me why we are all fixated on the so... By katekaos
our love is like the border between greece and albania.
our love is like the border between greece and albania. By katekaos
at the bar.
at the bar. By katekaos
fire at will.
fire at will. By katekaos
at the walker art center, minneapolis.
at the walker art center, minneapolis. By katekaos
this is not for you.
this is not for you. By katekaos