Have you ever ridden a brontosauraus?
No, what's it like?
Fucking amazing. It takes forever to get up on the back because you have to scale the tail and kind of shimmy the rest of the way up.
You don't just like climb a ladder?
No, I think it's too tall.
Still ... they should use a cherry picker or something.
I dunno, climbing up is really half the fun. Gripping on to that rough skin, feeling your body rub against it, taking in that strong bronto smell. It's totally worth it. And then once you get to the top, the view is just breathtaking.
Do they strap you in or anything?
There's a saddle, yeah, which is good because once they start moving, you need to hold on tight. I know they don't look like they move very fast, but they're so big, each step really takes you far. The rush of wind in your face feels so good, and you just feel so sympatico with this giant creature, you know? One time I yelled out like WOO HOO! and the bronto turned his head to look and he fucking smiled at me.
What? They can't really smile, can they?
Trust me man, once a bronto smiles at you, your life's not gonna get any better than that.
Created: Feb 23, 2012Brian J Document Media