The Whitebait Family Reunion - By Ben Childs

Cover Image

Christmas eve at the Billow's home

the tide was high

and wind a blow'n

Benny Billow lay down to sleep

as a whitebait named Frank swam alone in the deep


A whitebait is a teeny weeny fish

The type you would find

fried up in a dish

And their only family get together

Is in an icky squiggly whitebait fritter


Franky Fish was feeling alone

This Christmas eve

all on his own

Till he was hauled up from the wet

with his whole family in a whitebait fish net


Look who it is! Look how he's grown!

Our little Frank

can swim alone

He's growing up and handsome too

Who'd have thought he'd be swimming alone in the blue


Dear Uncle Pat gave Franky a pinch

I swear you have grown

a whole mili-inch!

Suddenly their conversation ran dry

As the water dripped off and they started to fry


Franky met somebody he didn't know

But he faked recognition

well, he gave it go

“Hello Uncle Douglas! No, wait! Uncle Dan?”

Things were getting un-comfy on top of the pan


Cousins Slimey and Bubbles didn't talk

Aunt Marbles was deaf

and Squirt tried to walk

and Grandmother Popeye had forgotten his name

and Spud was being a down-right pain

Uncle Pat pinched him again and again

and it turned out the fish was Uncle Dwayne

Aunt Marbles drank too much champagne

conversations were so hard to maintain

and then Spud demanded a Candy-cane

and Franky the fish tried searching his brain

for a way out that wasn't too insane

so getting a boost from Uncle Dwayne

he jumped out aiming for the drain


And he landed quite squarely in the sink

before he had

any time to think

And swirling around, the speed getting higher

Frank was out of the frying pan, into the fire!


Franky the fish was washed out to sea

He had to admit

he was rather happy

I'd rather swim all on my own if I can

At least it's cooler out here, than on that fry-pan


Back at the Billow's house things were quite rough

Whitebait fritters for lunch

if that wasn't enough!

Benjamin Billow wasn't very impressed

Whitebait fritters are gross, disgusting at best!


And what thought have you given to these poor little fish?

You serve them all up

as a Christmas day dish

This family celebrates, you all go munch, munch

While their family gets eaten for our Christmas lunch!

Created: Jan 03, 2012


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