wishful thinking.

By emilyxjames

arrived late at the show. was there barely fifteen seconds before you saw me. i stood frozen in place. and you sent a glare in my direction. i felt suffocated. went outside, and you walked over to talk to me. towering above me. an awkward confrontation, and i didn't think you would talk to me. i didn't know what to say. sat there awkwardly and shook my head. i felt deprived of the words i wanted to scream in your face. instead i resorted to chain smoking and looking away. "i'm not going to stand here and watch you cry." "then just walk away." i sat there where you left me. i can't say i'm sorry anymore. [that phrase is as worn and stretched and thin as i am. tired and aching.] you know that i am. you heard me the first time. i keep hoping for a return to normalcy. a period of late-night breakfasts at ihop where you wrap your feet around mine as we smirk at each other from across the table. iced tea and pancakes. or big bear hugs that leave you with your face buried in me, eyes closed, for a minute that stretches to forever. all i can do is hope. and move on. and try not to fuck up so much in the future.

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wishful thinking.

Created: Feb 06, 2010

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