Enjoy it While You Can

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(Just a few things I didn't really even notice until they were gone. I really think most of these truths are universal.)


 


1.Your parents washer and dryer.


 


2.The ability to strap wheels to your feet and not completely shatter on impact.


 


3.The knowledge that although you don't look perfect, you may yet develop into a swan.(Having topped out at 5'1” I can safely put that one to bed.)


 


4.Baths...showers suck.


 


5.Being able to stretch your face any way you like with the sure knowledge that your parents are full of crap and that your face will not in fact stick that way. Enjoy that while you can because your parents were telling you at least some small variation of the cold hard truth...you can see an example of this on the face of anyone over twenty five who has just awoken.....those pillow marks will not go away for hours.


 


6.Insurance...health and car. Oh yeah, you'll miss that when it's not free. You will learn and be willing to try home remedies that Spartans would consider to dangerous.


 


7.Furniture that doesn' t hurt you. When you venture into the world you find that you can only afford furniture which is very low to the ground or has at least one broken spring, leg, or arm....go ahead take a look around, I'll wait.


 


8.Vitamin C. You will find that the all night gas station where you do most of your grocery shopping doesn't stock much in the way of fruits and veggies...you really should grab some O.J. And consider drinking it without vodka. I know what you're thinking...without vodka, why bother? Scurvy is not just a funny word my friend.


 


9.Unlimited underwear. Used to be you opened a drawer and there they were, a whole stack, clean, folded, lightly scented by dryer sheets. No More! You damn well better know how many pairs you own and exactly how many days it has been since you visited your mother. Nothing says pathetic like desperately rearranging furniture at 6am hoping that a clean pair may have magically fallen behind the refrigerator.


 


10.Mayonnaise. Sigh* This seems silly but I always thought that condiments were delivered by the same friendly man who brought me light bulbs and hot water. I was wrong.


 


Anything I missed?

Created: Mar 26, 2011

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