Scars

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2 am.


I couldn't sleep, just those nights where I have consumed too much siesta and caffeine to lay at bed,


I stood up and went to the kitchen, a loud whispering of a mosquito invaded my ears, I squashed it when it landed to my wrist.


Crimson oozing like my own, and then I saw those goddamn lines again and I remember;


I sat and typed.


Hey,


I was having a late night snack and somehow a freaking mosquito just bit me and its so gross,


Anyways, how are you?


I haven't heard from you for a while, mainly cause it's my fault shutting you out,

But believe me when I say— I miss you.


I really do. I know its absurd, and I know you'll laugh at me but then I see pass those eyes and I just know that you were just something,


You hurt me, so much. But I can't erase those moments that you were so carefree, that you danced in the middle of the rain,


How you skipped classes to play video games, laughed at a joke that isn't funny anymore,


How you felt like you have nowhere to come home, no one to be with. How you cursed the world, how you asked for answers why you felt so self destructive, like a bomb on it's last second,


And how you cried while you had that awful, sad smile on.


I wanted to forget you. Because if I didn't, you'll haunt me to this day,

And for the most part, I always get reminded.


You were like this puzzle piece of a picture I no longer recognize anymore,


There's this gap, this distance between us that disconnects the both of us and yet;

There were these lines that doesn't want us to forget.


Its like recalling that there was sadness, there was pain, there were those days that it felt unbearable.


And god I will give you a hug if I could back then. I'd hug you so tight that all your broken pieces stick together,


If you're wondering, I'm doing okay. Grand, actually.


I've gotten healthier, I'm living a life that doesn't feel forced, smiling because I felt the rush to,


I'm great. Really great.


But, yeah. I want to tell you that you're amazing, that you're strong and that you can do whatever you put your mind to,


I want to thank you, from the deepest of my heart, for staying strong when you were at the end of the rope,


I'm grateful.


You will be okay. You will be happy. I assure you this.


I sent it to my own email address.

Created: Jun 30, 2017

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