I have a superpower.
As a kid, I had actually wished for the power to read people's minds, but, you know, you can't choose the natural gifts you are granted.
I didn’t realize I had this ability until I was twenty six, but I think that’s common - for superheros to not realize their abilities as children. We just don’t know as much when we’re young. However, I will say that I had suspicions earlier. I just felt… different.
I first noticed it around my family. Soon enough, with my friends and then other kids at school. Even teachers. It used to make me sad, I thought I was just being ignored… that no one loved me, that no one cared. I spent many years in a dark place emotionally. Seems so silly now.
The moment that I realized that what I was experiencing was actually a special power, was Christmas Eve, with my family. As usual, when my brother arrived with his family, I seemed to vanish. I remember thinking, do they realize how this food that they’re eating ended up here? (Now I realize, that must be so strange to just show up and eat, not knowing.) When it was time to open gifts, they all packed the living room, I was left to stand along the edges, watching. As they laughed and talked and opened gifts, I started to get a bit low. I just stared at the floor, he had always been the favorite. It must have been at least a half hour before I looked up again, suddenly aware of the fact that I have been staring at that very same spot the entire time. I looked up to see if anyone had noticed. The chatter and cheer was still in full swing. *Sigh* I feel like I’m invisible. Like I’m not actually here. In fact, I’m certain that if someone were to reach down and pluck me out of this living room, no one would notice. It started sinking in. I wonder… if… I’m actually invisible?! I looked at my hands, and feet, clear as day to me. But that doesn’t mean anything. I decided to speak up a few times… no luck - obviously when I turn invisible, it is also as if my mute button had been pushed. I thought about how else I could test this. I decided to just stay silent for a long period of time - if they had known I was there, it would surely be noticed at some point, right? Because that would sure be strange, for someone to just stand there, not saying a word, all night. An hour passed. And another. I was amazed! It must be true! Wow… I can’t believe it! Oooh that possibilities! Oddly enough though, the dog was able to see me, and curled up at my feet. But I’ve heard dogs can sense all kinds of things we humans can’t.
I began to notice my superpowers strengthening, as I could expand their use to things like gatherings with my friends or at parties. Similar to the Christmas Eve experience, I would test things out by trying to contribute to conversations, louder and louder. No one would ever even look or pause. Then I would try to just sit there, in a chair, on a step, on the floor even, not saying a word, for the rest of the night, watching the people pass by. Again, no one noticed! I did get tripped on a few times, but even still, nothing! Powers confirmed.
I have always been an introvert, so I don’t entirely mind. At times, this power feels like a curse, as I sometimes desperately wish to be seen, noticed, if only for a moment. However, not many people can do this. To just completely disappear. To think, I’ve spent most of my life so sad about not fitting in, not being the favorite child, being ignored and unloved, just wishing I could disappear, when this whole time, I was actually was disappearing!
Ah. I tell ya, sometimes in life, it is just a matter of perspective.
There’s just one thing… I mean, I don’t really understand how it works… It isn’t like I choose when to disappear, it just seems to happen. And, in a few situations, I have been seen to some degree, I know it. ...I guess those people just may be like the kind of people who can see ghosts or something.
Created: Jun 16, 2017nfgartist Document Media