Confession Diary Entries

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January 2017

Amber came over today and showed me a really great website she found called HitRecord.  Artists both professional and non-professional apparently collaborate to develop art.   There are challenges, projects and the like.  She wants me to join, as it would be a great "stress reliever"   to get back into writing and photography.  I said it had been way to long.  I had not written anything in over 15 years nor taken any photos aside from standard family pictures.  We compromised and I said I would spend some time checking out the website. 


February to March 2017

This site it pretty cool, but there is no way I'm joining.  The talent I've seen it is way too intimidating and I still can't get over the feeling that I will be laughed right off .    I don't know how to do anything.  I really don't.  I don't know how to edit a photo at all.  I don't know anything about Gifs or animation.  I don't know any of the terminology for script writing or what the hell remixing is.  It kind of makes me feel stupid and who really likes that feeling.  Seeing everyone's art and creativity is amazing though and I did figure out how to look for challenges, some I understand, other's I have no idea.  I have come to realize my photography before was simply point and shoot and my writing...well was basic to say the least. 


April 28-April 30, 2017

Dear Diary:

Alright, so I joined HitRecord.  Even managed to make a few posts (just easy little photographs and  personal writing challenges).  No one has laughed me off the site yet.  I even managed to get a few likes (hearts).  People actually seem encouraging and nice.  Maybe this won't be so bad. 


May 1, 2017

Dear Diary

I wrote my first fiction story since elementary school (decades ago).  It was not as hard as I thought.  Even received some nice comments. What nice people.  I think I still enjoy looking at others work more than producing my own though. 


Tonight I also downloaded two free photo editor programs.    I opened them up and swore out loud.  Intimidating !!!!! I'm not one to give up and usually I can figure things out but DAMN....I'm just not sure about this.  I think the terminology is what's getting me and I will only figure it out by playing. 


I don't expect my art to go anywhere, nor my writing.  I am being creative solely for me (and if others happen to like it that's wonderful too).  I do so much for others and have let all my hobbies slip while my husband and kids indulge in theirs.  I am finding my stress levels more manageable now that I am taking me time.  I have down time at work, travel time and the kids go to bed early.  I have time for a hobby ...what made me ever think I did not.  


May to June 9, 2017

Dear Diary

I don't feel so intimidated anymore (it's still there, but not as bad).  I am learning things on my own and for no one's benefit but mine.  I have figured out remixing (and how to properly cite references).  I have learned the basics of editing photos and have even learned how to make basic Gifs.  I'm participating in writing challenges (even managed to get one of my works featured in one challenge and an honorary mention in another). 


My stress levels are way down and I'm slowly starting to take the time to see the beauty in life again.  It's a nice feeling to have found again. 

Created: Jun 10, 2017

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