I straddled his waist as his muscular hands squeezed my hips. My palms memorized the curves and dents of his face.
I was overjoyed that we had gotten to spend the last four months reconnecting. After nine years of Pining for this man I had finally gotten what I yearned for. Now that I had a taste of what life was like with him at my side I knew I would be devastated by our inevitable separation. His body under mine I could feel a small piece of my heart being torn from its home. I wanted time to stop. I wanted this moment to last.
A smile crossed his face. It was that sly smooth smile that made my heart skip. He added a wink. A gasp caught in my throat. He knew what he was doing to me. He knew he had complete control of my reaction towards him. I giggled like a young teenage girl that had caught her crush winking at her.
"I've decided I'm gonna go back to Hawaii. I miss my family." His hands stroked my sides sending electric pulses through my skin.
I slowly nodded in acknowledgment. "Yea, I know. Since we started seeing each other you always told me you were going back." I told myself not to cry. I told myself no tears. I reminded myself that it was better to have loved then to have never loved at all.
"I'm leaving the beginning of next month."
"Oh...okay." My eyes avoided his gaze. "What's gonna happen? I mean will I come visit you? Will you come visit me? Are we done? Will we just be friends and then together when we see each other? How's this gonna work?"
"You know...I've been thinking...". His voice was soft. His fingers pushed the loose hair behind my ears. "I want you and Angel to move to Hawaii."
Past conversations haunted my memory. Numerous times he had stated he would never marry. Numerous times he had stated he never wanted to have kids. I had asked him to move in with me and he had declined.
"Okay. Well...how would that work? I mean would you go out there and find a place for me and Angel? I'll send you the money for deposit and all that. But...would we live near you?" A look of amusement washed over his face.
"I want you to move with me." He chuckled.
"Like...we live together?" I was struck with confusion. "I thought you didn't want to live with me."
"Yea stupid..." He playfully squeezed my sides. A sequel left my belly. I toppled over onto my side next to him. "I'm not gonna move in with you in that place we both call hell. Fuck that. So yea...no thank you. I ain't living in hell when I can live in paradise. And I want you guys to come with me."
He stopped squeezing my sides. His hazel eyes burned into mine. It had taken nine years for this moment to happen. The flame we had cautiously ignited and maintained inside of ourselves was no longer manageable. We had looked away for a moment too long. The fire had escaped its controlled environment and had started an unmanageable forest fire.
"Yes. We'll go with you. I don't want anything but to be with you. I love you...". I could feel the knot in my throat grow. My emotions overwhelmed me. These were feelings I had never experienced before. I had never known true happiness in my life. I looked inwardly. If this was a feeling I had never felt before and I had never felt happiness before, was this what happiness felt like? It was exhilarating.
I looked into his glowing face. His arm slipped under my side while the other wrapped around my back pulling me to him. Our lips met. Electricity flowed through my body.
That feeling was true happiness. A feeling that has never left me since that day. Even if sadness comes, problems enter through the door, disasters hit, or even when evil wins, that feeling has never left my spirit. That happiness is a gift that man has given to me each day since that day when he decided to invite us into his life.
Nine years...nine years of regrets, what if's, loneliness, and longing. Nine years of stalled happiness. Nine years of missed smiles, hugs, kisses, laughs, and love making. Nine years...realistically I thank God it was only nine years...it could have been a lifetime. Why is that my happiest day? Because that is the day my true love...my soul mate...my best friend...asked us to always be a part of his life.
Created: Jun 09, 2017Sleyvac Document Media