i looked up expecting to see sky but instead i saw sand and the white foam riding in on the tide.
i looked down expecting to see sand but instead i saw the clean blue sky and five or six clouds.
i felt nauseous.
i felt tired.
i could hear seagull cries over the swoosh of the ocean.
i was upside-down clutching a rock.
the rock was sun-warm.
i had become a bearded dragon.
i could feel my blood getting warmer.
it felt like warm custard flowing through my body.
i pushed out my stomach so it was grazing the rough warm rock.
i flared my beard.
i wanted to bask on this rock for a long time.
it felt great.
and the fresh salty breeze was lovely.
two months later a beautiful woman appeared on the sand.
she approached my rock.
picked me up and tickled my soft scaly stomach.
then she hurled me way out into the sea.
i went under.
i was caught in a rip.
i sucked water into my nostrils.
the salt stung my bulbous eyes.
i was panicking.
i was not an amphibian, never had been.
i was blinking more than ever.
but something inside my head told me to calm down.
actually, it wasn't in my head.
well, it was and it wasn't.
it was a manatee speaking to me telepathically.
it swam around me in a circle.
it imparted an ancient wisdom to me.
and i found that i could breathe under water now.
so i swam deeper, where the water was black and colder than loneliness.
i swam towards a glow-in-the-dark anemone that was stuck to a slimy rock shelf.
it was singing quietly.
i tried to understand the words.
i couldn't though.
so i kicked the anemone.
it became dislodged from its rock and slowly sank to the centre of the blackness.
i swam over and took its place on the rock.
it was freezing cold, that rock.
my blood was cooling down.
i felt uninspired.
i was getting weak.
i closed my eyes and dreamed of warm custard being poured into a blow-hole in my back.
three years later a beautiful merman appeared.
he was holding a clam.
he prised it open and offered it to me.
there was a pearl sitting on some pink fluffy cushions.
i reached for it.
the merman snapped the clam shut.
which chopped off my front-left leg, fml.
the merman said something in a language i couldn't understand and swam away holding the clam.
i expected to see inky red blood puffing out into the water.
but instead i saw that a glow-in-the-dark anemone had immediately grown in place of my missing leg.
i felt exhausted.
Created: Jun 09, 2017spookybeach Document Media