EXT. DOG PARK - DAY
Three dogs chat as they dog-and-people watch.
FIDO: (sighs contentedly) My roommate is the best!
REX: Oh dog, my roomi's the sweetest thing!
KILLER: Mine too.
KILLER: But um…
KILLER: Nah it’s nothing.
FIDO: No, what?
KILLER: Okay, don’t get me wrong. I love my roomie, but...
KILLER: I just think he might be a little... off.
FIDO: What do you mean?
KILLER: Well, does yours ever, y'know... steal your poop?
REX: Oh! Yeah mine does that sometimes.
FIDO: Like every day.
KILLER: Oh! Do they all do that?
REX: Yeah, they love poop.
KILLER: Got it.
The dogs stare off at the park.
KILLER: So what do you think they do with it?
REX: I dunno. Never really thought about it.
FIDO: Well they gotta be eating it right?
REX: Nah dog. Myroomie´s been taking my poop for years, and I’ve never smelled it on his breathe. Not once.
KILLER: Well what do they do with their own poop?
REX: They put it in their water bowl.
Killer and Fido look at Rex, too shocked and disgusted to speak.
FIDO: Uggg! I've just drinked from it over breakfast! That's psychotic!
REX: I know.
KILLER: Ugh! Remind me never to drink from there again.
The dogs shake off their disgust. Beat.
KILLER: And what's up with all the crying?
REX: Yeah! Wait.. what?
FIDO: What are you talking about?
KILLER: You know how our roomies go into their rooms at night, and lock the door, and then just cry for like a really long time? So weird, right?
REX: Mine's never done that! But he likes to dig holes in the garden at night.
KILLER: What for? Late night gardening?
REX: I thought so too, but the other day I went sniffing about and found a pile of bones buried.
FIDO: Why did he...?
REX: I think he just wanted to surprise me and left them there for me to find! He is the sweetest!
HUMAN VOICE (O.S.):Rex! Come here girl!
REX: Well, looks like I better go. See ya!
KILLER: Alright, see ya.
FIDO: Take care. And enjoy those bones!
Rex runs off. Fido and Killer look after her, bemused. Then look at each other.
Created: Jun 06, 2017aaalejo Document Media