Dog Park [Rewrite Remix]

Cover Image


Three dogs chat as they dog-and-people watch.

FIDO: (sighs contentedly) My roommate is the best!

REXOh dog, my roomi's the sweetest thing!

KILLER: Mine too. 


KILLER: But um…

REX: What?

KILLER: Nah it’s nothing.

FIDO: No, what?

KILLEROkay, don’t get me wrong. I love my roomie, but...

REX: What?!

KILLER: I just think he might be a little... off.

FIDO: What do you mean?

KILLERWell, does yours ever, y'know... steal your poop?

REX: Oh! Yeah mine does that sometimes.

FIDO: Like every day.

KILLER: Oh! Do they all do that?

FIDO: Mm-hm.

REX: Yeah, they love poop.

KILLER: Got it.

The dogs stare off at the park. 

KILLERSo what do you think they do with it?

REXI dunno. Never really thought about it.

FIDOWell they gotta be eating it right?

REX: Nah dog. Myroomie´s been taking my poop for years, and I’ve never smelled it on his breathe. Not once.

KILLER: Well what do they do with their own poop?

REX: They put it in their water bowl.

Killer and Fido look at Rex, too shocked and disgusted to speak. 

FIDO: Uggg! I've just drinked from it over breakfast! That's psychotic!

REX: I know.

KILLER: Ugh! Remind me never to drink from there again.

The dogs shake off their disgust. Beat.

KILLER: And what's up with all the crying?

REX: Yeah! Wait.. what?

FIDO: What are you talking about?

KILLER: You know how our roomies go into their rooms at night, and lock the door, and then just cry for like a really long time? So weird, right?

REX: Mine's never done that! But he likes to dig holes in the garden at night.
KILLER: What for? Late night gardening?
REX: I thought so too, but the other day I went sniffing about and found a pile of bones buried.
FIDO: Why did he...?
REX: I think he just wanted to surprise me and left them there for me to find! He is the sweetest!


HUMAN VOICE (O.S.):Rex! Come here girl!

REX: Well, looks like I better go. See ya!

KILLER: Alright, see ya. 

FIDO: Take care. And enjoy those bones!

Rex runs off. Fido and Killer look after her, bemused. Then look at each other.


Created: Jun 06, 2017

Tags: script, rewrite, remix, fiction, conversation, dogs, park, poop, buried, digging

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