Oklahoma Has Never Been My Friend.

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Help me see the positive so I can sleep with a smile on.

So.. I hunted down the perfect room for me to totally relax and pamper myself in. I've never bathed in a giant spa tub.. I've never booked a room anywhere all by my lonesome. I spent more than was advertised on a specific room with a canopy bed, fireplace, all the luxury and charm I could find. I arrive at my destination just outside of Oklahoma City.. as I said I would-10pm.

The curb appeal is fantastic. Almost enchanting. I'm a weary traveler who is anxious to fill the tub up with a giant bottle of Mr. Bubbles, bath salts and bath bombs.. scrub down, soak, mask, condition.. light a candle or two, with my six-pack of Blue Moon.. indulge in the crappy Panda Express I just bought. I mean, I totally overdid it. I went all out.. I deserve it.

I find a nice note addressed to me on the door with instructions. I fumble with the lock box for 10 minutes to reveal the house key. My note says I, "Erica" am up the stairs in a room with a name I don't recognize. The room I booked was called "Emerald Dreams". The note said I was in the "English Hunting Room". It's late. I'm nice so I don't call to see if there was a mix-up. There was. Stupid, boring, dusty, small room.. with a certain type of curly hairs lingering in the average sized bathtub.

I decide I am too tired and too chicken to throw a fuss.. so I settle in.. put my things in their place and decide I'll make the best of it.

I draw up a bath, try to get comfortable behind the sliding glass. A moment into my relaxation, I hear knocking. I freak out. I'm covered in a mountain of bubbles, I drop my stale, (burnt) Rangoon in the overly hot magical liquid potion I've created.

I turn down my tunes a few notches thinking maybe I was just disturbing someone with the gentle acoustic tones.. the knocking continues.

I jump out the tub, find a robe. It's completely see-through so that's not uncomfortable at all. A small middle-aged Asian man wearing a tan trench is at the door. Next to him is a small purple leopard suitcase. He explains that there were two Erica's and I was to be on the other side of the pond in my fancy suite. Naked, flustered and strewn about.. I smile and say quickly, "it's fine".. honestly, I don't believe there is another Erica. IAmErica.

He keeps me at the door with confusing directions on how to order breakfast. Eh... don't think I'll be doing that. I don't know.

I feel better after venting.

But, if you have insight- I'm all ears.

I want a damn refund. And after all of the trouble with Enterprise earlier today.. blah.

I can't wait to be in Texas. Screw you Oklahoma.

Created: May 02, 2017


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