The Last Clap Part 1 (comedy sketch)

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FADE IN:


INT. COFFEE SHOP - DAY


Two awkward teenage girls, GRETA and VEE, stand in line. A sign near them reads: "Sunday Morning Open Mic."


GRETA: Oh my pagan gods, Vee.


VEE: I know. I know.


GRETA: Oh. My. Pagan. Gods. I can’t believe we’re actually about to see Richard playing guitar.


VEE: And singing. Don’t forget the singing.


GRETA: Oh my. Pagan gods.


They make their way to a disinterested MAN seated behind a table, who is collecting money for entrance into the 'show.'


MAN: Five dollars each.


GRETA: Don’t you want to see our IDs?


MAN: This is an open mic. At a coffee shop. You don’t need IDs. Just five dollars each.


VEE: But we paid 100 bucks for them.


Vee sticks her ID in his face. He looks at her and then takes the ID and reads it out loud.


MAN: Miriam Goldwater. Born 1967. That would make you...?


VEE: Like thirty-seven years old.


The man looks at her in surprise.


VEE: I’ve aged well.


MAN: More “like” (he quotes with fingers as he says this) forty-seven years old.


GRETA: Damn it, Vee!


VEE: Greta!


They both cover their mouths as they realize they have just given away their real names. The man hands Vee back her ID.


MAN: Go take a seat, ladies. The show will start in a few minutes.


GRETA: Don’t you want our money?


MAN: Just go sit!


----


(I broke the original record up into 2 parts.. it was just a tad too long for one record, methinks. See Part 2 below if you want to read more -- they get even more ridiculous..)   ;  )

Created: Mar 28, 2014

Tags: teenage, script, comedy, sketch

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