For my Mother

By yotsechan

even before
the slow ascent that took her away
from me,
she was unpredictable
like the electricity in her new home,
long before
I had to turn my face away because the sun
made me blink from staring skywards
for so long,
she was always looking down,
reminding me that I had to study hard
harder, harder, harder
until it hurt
like the marks on my arms

and even before
she decided to try for a better world
and abandon the notion of a better family,
she would buy me donut holes
by the dozen
hoping that
the sweet ounces of comfort
could give me
a mother

I wish I had known
that she hid her salt tears
with those glazed desserts;
that she shoved
her disappointment
behind her fury

I wish I had known
about her heartache
I had already reaped
my indifference

For my Mother

Created: Jul 20, 2010

Tags: poetry attempt

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