Pale Waters be not by Ocean: a Love Story

By comprehensionandsecrecy

Pale Waters be not by Ocean: a Love Story

How long has it been…
since we’ve been together?

five minutes into a Thursday morning
i sip my morning whiskey
i know – hush…
keep silent - your loaded words gun me down
-how pale the sky looks without its birds…
shut up…

the trees shadow a birdless sky
and i’m driving down this road today – and there’s an empty seat to my right
and i’m too tired of seeing the sun set like this – maybe some rain today…

the cigarette smoke in a woman –
you drink because our money says we can
and you’re looking too good with your black dress-
how plastic we look at each other tonight…
i sit here with an empty glass
and the glass lines with beautiful alcohol – you talk in the background
shut up…
i call the bartender- one more round, please…
and i loosen my tie off – my eyes aren’t red enough
and i sip my evening whiskey…
the whiskey – she seems to love me more than you

i leave
and you keep talking in the background
shut up
how many miles apart are we? – maybe enough, for me, today…
it really doesn’t matter to me and maybe i’m driving too fast tonight
i don’t know – ask the whiskey bottle in the passenger seat to the right
i’m too tired – i turn the radio on – there’s nothing on
shut up…

how many miles apart are we? – now… well, good enough
a kiss with the whiskey bottle at least feels more real – finishing the half of –
more, please…
my eyes aren’t red enough for the airport – how many more miles apart if i flew?
and if i were to put my luggage through inspection, what would they say to one more bottle of whiskey and a dry heart…
(please, please, x-ray machine, pretend you don’t know me …)

maybe i won’t go

– i walk to my car – and the whiskey gives me another kiss
and i indulge-

how many miles apart are we? – now that i’m by this ocean
i’m too tired – i’m thirsty – my eyes aren’t red enough
i’ve always driven too fast, maybe too fast tonight
the ocean and such a view from my drowning car and i

the iron ocean buries me, and i am caught – it sounds me asleep
i want to be caught – but not like this, never…
- my eyes aren’t red enough to drown – i don’t care, i’m too tired – where’s my whiskey?
-the rushing water never sounded better – nothing better than to hover in thirst in this ocean tonight – a lullaby…
the water’s not that cold at this moment, maybe that’s what the ice in my whiskey glass thought this morning… maybe my heart’s just numb because my body says its cold as hell-

you’ll tell me off tomorrow morning when i’m still sleeping in this drowning car – don’t tell me that i’m drunk
i know that… i don’t care, ‘cause my car won’t be parked out on the driveway tomorrow morning… it’ll be here-
-by the beautiful pale water of the ocean and under the iron sky and there are so many birds tonight – so many
i indulge in the last bit of whiskey tonight before the ocean overtakes me…
i feel so loved by the ocean today

i had enough of this life, this whiskey, and maybe i was never tired, and maybe my eyes have already blacked out (maybe they were never red)…
you’re still talking maybe, with your black dress, and maybe you haven’t notice
that i’m gone-
shut up…
don’t call me, don’t yell at me, don’t touch me, don’t kiss me
don’t look at me when they pull my drowned, drunk-self out
don’t cry, this isn’t a movie scene-
shut up, shut up, shut up…
put me back in the ocean…

i didn’t have to live this long
i didn’t have to know you
i didn’t have to drink
i didn’t have to try
- a question of science

my heart runs dry on whiskey-
and my eyes aren’t red enough-
and maybe this water is cold-

five minutes into a Thursday night-

what was this? – a love story
pale waters be not by ocean…

“I hate loneliness, but loneliness loves me…”
-the speaking loveless

-today, was enough…

Pale Waters be not by Ocean: a Love Story

Created: Jul 18, 2010


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